see One Downer of a Commencement Speech
Congratulations, high school graduates. You have now exhibited some level of state-mandated proficiency in the core subjects. We exposed you to electives in business, agriculture, theater, psych, theology, sociology and economics. You may have even made some fond memories and lifelong friendships while you were at it. Celebrate this event, smug in your understanding that we will never again expect you to formulate another trigonometric equation, ask you to tell us the capital of Bolivia*, or present a book report complete with dioramas.
Too bad you don’t know squat about the first thing you’ll face upon your leaving the roost: financial decision making. In spite of this, 85% of y’all will go to college, where every move you make will impact your financial health, for better or for worse, for years to come. It’s a make-or-break ordeal that requires navigation through a constant barrage of heady choices with large price tags. This is a recipe for failure, but go, knowing we all wish you well in your new ventures. Continue reading